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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24123556">Of Gods and Mortals</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquilaTempestas/pseuds/AquilaTempestas'>AquilaTempestas</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>SMITE (Video Game)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Don't drink Baron's brew, F/M, Humour/Parody, one-night stand</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-11</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 15:49:28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,960</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24123556</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquilaTempestas/pseuds/AquilaTempestas</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After Zeus cheats on Hera again, Hera decides to leave Mount Olympus and seek companionship elsewhere. She visits Baron’s tavern and crosses paths with King Arthur. Will Hera take a leaf out of Zeus’s book?</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>King Arthur/Hera</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Of Gods and Mortals</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I don't know why I wrote this trash.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Argus slammed a fist through the Zeus statue, shattering it into pieces.</p><p>“Vile, wretched husband…” Hera spat, glaring at the remains, barely able to control her rage.</p><p>Zeus had done it again. He had gotten involved with another woman again. Hera had caught her husband having sex with a minion. A wretched minion of all things! How could he even lower himself to their standard was beyond her. Minions were their servants. Minions were beneath them. They were just petty mortals.</p><p>Zeus. The leader of the Olympian gods. Her husband and her brother. It was his idea to marry her. He wanted no other woman but her to rule at his side. Hera had turned his offers down many times, but eventually succumbed. Zeus had turned himself into a sick bird, and Hera had taken care of the animal. Zeus had raped her afterwards and forced her into marriage.</p><p>What a fool she had been.</p><p>She could not divorce the man. Once you married Zeus, you were wedded for life, and since they could not permanently die, they were wedded for eternity. Marriage meant nothing to the man. He fell in love with every female that moved. She even had suspicions that Zeus just liked to sleep with anything that was living. </p><p>Hera draw in a deep breath. She would get one of the minions to clean up the statue pieces. But that could wait. Right now she wanted to be somewhere other than Mount Olympus. She clicked her fingers. “Janus!”</p><p>The Roman god of portals. The god was always randomly showing up whenever he sensed trouble. Moments later, Janus appeared through a portal in a wall. “Good evening, Hera!” Janus said. “I sensed there was trouble.”</p><p>“Zeus. I want to get away from him. Please. Take me somewhere far away from here. A pleasant relaxing place. I need to clear my head.”</p><p>Janus nodded. “I know just the place. Please, step through.” He held out a hand for her to take.</p><p>She accepted it and followed Janus into a portal. Argus ran after her. Firmly grasping Janus’s hand, she squeezed her eyes shut. Entering one of Janus’s portals made you feel nauseous, and closing your eyes made it more bearable. After several moments, she opened her eyes again, and found herself standing in a tavern.</p><p>A sweet aroma filled the air. She couldn’t quite put a word to the scent, but it already made her feel more relaxed. She looked around the room, taking in her new environment. There were eight round tables with four wooden chairs each. A man who looked suspiciously like Apollo was playing the lyre in the corner.</p><p>“I must go,” Janus said. “Call me when you need me.” He disappeared through the portal.</p><p>A man wearing a purple suit and a top hat sauntered towards her, spinning his cane in the air, a big grin on his face. Baron Samedi. The man who treated every social occasion like a big party of friends. “Ah, hello there! Hera! My tavern has been graced with your royal presence!” He bowed.</p><p>She couldn’t tell if the man was joking or not. Baron always seemed to be pleased about something as if he had earned himself a penta kill. “Baron.” The last time they had met was in the mid lane.</p><p>“What troubles you, Hera?”</p><p>“Zeus,” Hera replied, her arms folded across her chest. </p><p>“Give him some of my brew. I can add some special ingredients I learned from Baba Yaga that will make him regret ever disrespecting you.” He placed an elbow on the table.</p><p>She raised an eyebrow. “I’m not interested in harming him specifically. I would prefer to harm the women he has touched. Or kill them whenever possible.” If Zeus couldn’t be killed, then she would harm his lovers. Every single one. “Do you have a brew that can deliver excruciating pain?”</p><p>Baron shook his head. “Not yet I’m afraid. My brew heals the body and the mind.”</p><p>Hera pouted. “What good is that?”</p><p>“It’s inexpensive and much tastier than normal wine.” He offered her a chalice and winked. “Have a sip. I insist.” </p><p>Hera looked down at it suspiciously, unsure. The liquid was a black-purplish colour and it smelled sweet like honey. She picked it up and brought the rim to her lips then cautiously took a sip. Immediately, she put it down startled by the strong flavour. A sense of peace spread through her body. </p><p>“That’s very… exquisite,” Hera said. Much tastier than Bacchus’s stuff.</p><p>Baron grinned. “Only the best for a beautiful lady.”</p><p>Hera was about to open her mouth to speak further when she heard a door swing open. Annoyed at the interruption, she glanced over her shoulder and cast a disdainful look at the intruders. Two men entered the room. One had short black hair and a sly grin. The other was a tall, blond muscular male with broad shoulders. Merlin and King Arthur.</p><p>“My liege, I insist! You will taste no finer brew!”</p><p>“Better than our offerings in Camelot?”</p><p>“When have I ever been wrong?”</p><p>The two men approached. </p><p>“Ah, Hera. We meet again, and it’s been quite some time too!” Merlin said.</p><p>Hera forced a smile. She had last crossed paths with Merlin and King Arthur to obtain their help to fight Jormungandr. Loki and his children had planned to take over the world, but their attempts had been thwarted. For now, at least. “Merlin. Arthur.” </p><p>“What is the queen of Greece doing in a place like this?” Merlin said.</p><p>“I could ask the same of you,” Hera replied, crossing one leg over the other.</p><p>Merlin looked at Arthur. “I insisted that the king here needs to get out a bit more. All that stuff with Jormungandr took a heavy toll on him.” He clapped his friend on the back. </p><p>“Baron has the finest brew. It makes you feel all sorts of things. Wonderful, really.”</p><p>Arthur rolled his eyes. “The last time you had anything to drink you ended up setting yourself on fire.”</p><p>Hera snickered. She had heard much about Merlin’s prowess. The man controlled three elements, but she wasn’t impressed. Any mage could be defeated in battle with the right strategy. </p><p>“A toast to the king… and queen,” Baron said, placing two more chalices on the table. He pushed one towards Merlin, and the other to Arthur. “I do look forward to seeing you all on the battlefield next weekend.”</p><p>“It will be a grand tournament indeed,” Merlin said, bringing the chalice to his lips. “Though I must say, why do the Greeks get to host again? They’ve had it every year since the tournament began.” </p><p>All three heads looked at Hera. She cleared her throat. “Because we keep winning the tournament. Therefore, we earn the rights to host. If you wish to earn the right, then you must take the cup from us.” Even though the Greeks had many issues, they always managed to outperform every other pantheon.</p><p>“Drink, my liege!” Merlin said, trying to encourage Arthur to drink. </p><p>Arthur reluctantly picked up the chalice. “It will not harm me?”</p><p>Baron shook his head. “Do you think I would spoil a party? Though I must warn you – there are some… side effects for the non-magical folk amongst us. You are drinking magic.”<br/>
Arthur raised an eyebrow. “What sort of side effects?”</p><p>Baron’s expression was neutral. “I cannot say. It varies. Some have reported strange tingling sensations. Others feel extremely happy. Nothing harmful of course, but your mind might not be as sharp as usual. You will recover by tomorrow morning.” </p><p>Merlin grinned. “Maybe you’ll reveal that you do have a sense of humour at last.”</p><p>“Drink, unless you’re too much of a coward,” Hera said with a mocking grin. Warriors were supposed to be tough and not afraid of anything, yet Arthur seemed afraid of a potion. Though she supposed in his defence he wasn’t a mage. There was no telling what would happen. </p><p>That seemed to encourage Arthur to drink up. He consumed the entire contents within seconds then put it down on the table. “I feel nothing different,” he said.</p><p>“Oh, give it some time,” Baron said. “Not even a strapping young man as yourself can be immune to the effects of my drink. Did I mention my brew acts as an aphrodisiac for non-magical folk?” he said with a wink.</p><p>“An aphrodisiac?” Arthur repeated, beginning to look pale. “What have you done to me?”</p><p>Baron tried not to smile. He looked at Merlin. “He’s going to throttle you later.”</p><p>“If he can catch me. He’ll be thanking me later. Honest. Well. Let him rest.”</p><p>Hera looked at the weakening king. Once a proud warrior. Now in a drunken stupor and fading fast. The poor man tried to grab onto the table to stop himself from falling, but he was too weak. Amazing. Fortunately, Merlin was there to stop the king from hitting the ground.</p><p>“You owe me a lot of gems,” Baron said. </p><p>Merlin nodded. “Of course, of course. Now come on. Help me drag him to bed.”</p><p>Arthur tried to protest, but his words came out in mumbles.</p><p>“That’s a powerful brew. What else did you add?”</p><p>Baron grinned. “Oh, Baba Yaga gave me a few extras. He’s the first to try it out.”</p><p>Hera just chuckled as the boys dragged King Arthur to one of the back rooms.</p><p>***</p><p>King Arthur opened his eyes and found himself staring up a white ceiling with a chandelier. He rolled over onto his side, feeling a strange sort of energy spreading throughout his body. Something that he hadn’t felt in many long years. Desire. An overpowering desire. Not for battle, but for love. A sexual desire.</p><p>Baron. The sly dog. The man had warned him he would be affected in a way a mage was not, but he hadn’t given a precise answer. Had he known this would happen? Would this feeling pass? Why had he trusted Merlin to come here again? He should’ve known this was going to result in something bad happening.</p><p>“Well, you’ve woken up at last.” A commanding feminine voice. Hera.</p><p>He immediately sat up then looked down at himself, making sure his clothing was still on. Fortunately, he wasn’t vulnerable. Relief poured through him. He still had some dignity at least. “What happened?”</p><p>“You had some brew to drink. Then you collapsed. Baron has never seen quite the reaction before,” Hera pointed out. “Neither have I really. Bacchus makes some foul stuff, but no one has ever reacted that way too.”</p><p>He lay back down, squeezing his eyes shut, trying to fight off the thoughts surfacing in his mind. Hera was a beautiful regal woman. A real queen. Zeus was a fool to cheat on a woman so divine. But Arthur was a married man. Guinevere was at home waiting for his return. He’d be no different to Zeus if he acted on his impulses now.</p><p>“I believe you took an aphrodisiac,” Hera pointed out, the corners of her mouth curving upwards into a smirk. “Merlin told me after you had collapsed. Baron’s brew contains this special berry found in the Mayan lands. Seems to have a powerful effect on non-magical folk. I heard something similar happened with Awilix and Ullr.” </p><p>An aphrodisiac. No wonder Baron hadn’t told him. But why had Merlin withheld the truth?</p><p>“Blasted Merlin,” he muttered. “Are you here to mock me?”</p><p>Hera looked at him, running a finger across her bottom lip, her dark eyes full of curiosity. “No, I’m not. You fascinate me. Normally, I wouldn’t bother with the likes of your kind, but why should I require to be faithful if Zeus is not?” She looked him up and down. “Zeus seduces women. He falls in love with everyone woman he crosses. He forced my love too. His appetite can never be satisfied.”</p><p>“If he’s so unfaithful and mistreats you, why do you stay?”</p><p>“I don’t have a choice. My brother is the king.”</p><p>Arthur raised an eyebrow. “You married your brother?”</p><p>Hera scowled. “He made me marry him.”</p><p>Greeks were an odd race of people, Arthur thought. So much incest, and they didn’t seem to think it was strange. And all their worries happened because of Zeus being unable to control himself. He changed the topic not wanting to discuss their family problems. That was an easy way to kill the mood, and he really needed attention.</p><p>“The effects of Baron’s potion will not wear off for several days,” Hera pointed out.</p><p>Not what he wanted to hear. He was thankful his armour hid his issue though Hera probably suspected it. She was obviously an experienced woman having a husband like Zeus around. “I cannot afford to wait several days! I must be at training tomorrow morning. I told Cu Chulainn I would be there to spar.” Arthur and Merlin had joined forces with the Celts to complete in the tournament.</p><p>“I can help you.”</p><p>“You want to use me to get back at Zeus?” </p><p>Hera’s features hardened. “I’ll make him feel what I feel every time he seduces some whore,” she spat, turning her head up to the ceiling. “I hope you know about this Zeus. Because I found a different king.” She lowered her gaze again.</p><p>Arthur gave her a nervous look. “I cannot marry you.”</p><p>“I don’t intend to marry you, foolish king.” She reached her hand out and touched his face. “You’re not a god, but you have the features of a god. I wonder if you have the skills of a god as well.”</p><p>A shudder raced down his spine. How could Zeus cheat on such a woman? </p><p>“I do not think this is wise,” he said, trying to conceal his nerves. He wanted her. But at the same time, he didn’t want to be on the receiving end of Zeus’s lightning bolts. “You are a beautiful woman, but you are not my queen.”</p><p>Her lips curved into a smirk. “Oh, you think I’m beautiful? The most beautiful woman in the lands?”</p><p>“Yes, of course,” he replied, drawing in a deep breath.</p><p>“Interesting. I wonder why Zeus takes so much interest in mortals. Gods can do everything. We should be the best at everything. Yet he finds himself unable to pull away from those mortal women. Is there perhaps something you mortals have that we gods do not have?” She touched his face again. A shudder raced down his spine. “You quiver at my touch. But I barely touched you. Sensitive indeed.”</p><p>“Really, Hera, this is not necessary…”</p><p>“But it is. You’ve caught my attention. I’m annoyed at Zeus. You are not escaping me. Take off that armour. Now.”</p><p>She used the same tone his wife did when she wanted something. Unlike his wife, Hera was a goddess and powerful. If he refused, she could easily summon Argus to pound him into the dirt again, and then he’d have to visit the underworld and find a way to be revived. It was much harder to be resurrected outside the tournament. You had to do all sorts of quests in Annwn, the Celtic Underworld. </p><p>“Of course.”</p><p>“Such a soldier. So, used to taking orders even though you are a king. How obedient you are.”</p><p>He did as commanded, climbing to his feet to remove the pieces of armour. All that remained were the loose garments he wore underneath. “Well, aren’t you going to look away?” he said. Hera was looking at him as if he were something tasty to eat. Did Greek gods eat people? He didn’t know. </p><p>“You haven’t got anything I haven’t seen before. I have lived a long time. I’m much older than you, foolish king. I will continue to live on while you become nothing but a legend in people’s stories. Undress.”</p><p>Oh, he was going to make Merlin target practice in the next training session for putting him in this situation. He was a king. Not some male prostitute, and he wasn’t going to be treated as one! “Is this how you treat Zeus? No wonder he seeks company from other women.”</p><p>Hera scowled. For a moment, he feared Argus would be summoned, but nothing happened.</p><p>“Are you trying to tell me what to do?”</p><p>“Giving orders isn’t going to make Zeus faithful to you. You can kill and torment all his lovers if you want, but that’s not going to make things better between you.” He then grinned despite the situation nerves forgotten. “Maybe you’re not a convincing lover.”</p><p>Her lips pressed into a thin line and again, he feared for his life. But surprisingly Argus was not summoned. She seemed to be deep in thought, containing her rage. “I’ll have to show you then, won’t I?” She shoved him back onto the bed. “Undress,” she repeated.</p><p>He obeyed, raising his arms to allow her to remove his shirt. </p><p>She ran her fingers down his chest. “Not a god, but the body of a god too…” she murmured, her hands now tracing lazy circles across his firm abdominal muscles. “How is that even possible?” she added, removing her tiara placing it down on the table beside them.</p><p>Pushing her back, he sat upright then wrapped his arms around her, kissing her hungrily. He pulled her body close to his own, encouraged by the moan he elicited from her. He could feel the warmth of her body on his skin. </p><p>She drew back with a sly grin. “Feeling ravenous, Arthur Pendragon?”</p><p>“Less talking,” he replied, tone laced with lust. </p><p>“Yes, you could be doing something more.” Her lips replaced her hands.</p><p>He drew in a sharp breath as he felt her lips tenderly kiss his skin. She continued her movements, working her way downwards until she reached his leather belt. Giving him a wry grin, she swiftly undid the belt, throwing it aside. Her eyes were lit up with anticipation. </p><p>He didn’t need further encouragement. He removed the rest of his clothing, leaving him exposed before her, feeling her gaze wander over his body. “Should I assist in you removing your clothing?” he breathed, trying to control his eagerness. </p><p>“Such a gentleman,” Hera murmured. “But no. A queen does not need help.” She removed her dress, exposing her full breasts immediately. </p><p>Immediately, he changed positions with her, prompting a surprised squeal from her. He pushed her back onto the bed, so he was above her. He looked down at her, her dark brown hair spread out on the pillow, admiring her regal beauty. Immediately, he moved his hands to the curves of her body, his hands roaming upwards towards her breasts, cupping them eagerly. He kissed her again, then trailed his mouth further down, eager to impress the queen.</p><p>“What are you-” Hera started, but finished her sentence with a moan, as he pulled her undergarments down her legs. </p><p>“Does Zeus treat you like a queen?” </p><p>He threw her undergarments aside, pressing kisses against the skin of her inner thigh before moving in between her folds, receiving another moan from her. Lifting her legs over his shoulders, he pressed himself closer to her. Her legs began to shake, and she rocked her hips against his mouth, desperate for more attention. Soon, he felt her thighs clamp firmly around his head as she reached her peak. Her whimpers were like music to his ears. Perhaps he would have to thank Merlin later instead.</p><p>“Zeus? Never. No playing around with him.”</p><p>He pulled his head back and looked down at her. There were actual tears in her eyes. </p><p>“Zeus does what he wants. Takes what he wants. He doesn’t care about your needs and wants.”</p><p>Arthur made a mental note to ensure Zeus suffered greatly the next time they met on the battlefield. All the stories told stated Hera was a vicious, jealous woman, but it was Zeus who had made her that way. She deserved better. She deserved a real king. But alas, she was not of his pantheon.</p><p>Keeping her legs on his shoulders, he carefully bent her legs back to make it easier for him to slide himself in. A gasp escaped her throat as he inserted his firm shaft inside. Grasping her legs tightly, he slowly began to thrust into her. At first, his movements were slow, to allow her to become accustomed to him. Once he decided she was comfortable, he quickened his movements. She didn’t protest. This part she was familiar with. </p><p>He continued to thrust himself in and out, burying himself deeper with each movement, her breasts bouncing each time. Whilst he increased his speed, he kissed her ravenously, as she wrapped her legs around him. Soon, their movements matched. It wasn’t long until he felt himself start to pulse. With a deep groan, he released his seed into her. He waited a few moments for her to release then withdrew. A weariness overcame him as he rolled over onto his back, catching his breath. </p><p>Hera lay still for a few moments then sat up, showing no signs of exhaustion at all. She looked down at him with a wry grin. “I think I’m starting to understand why Zeus goes after mortal women. There’s a different… feel. A warmth. It’s hard to explain, but gods do not display affection. At least, Zeus does not. I am curious about this… act mortals speak of.”<br/>
“And what act would that be?”</p><p>Her eyes shifted downwards. “I want to return the favour.”</p><p>“That isn’t necessary.” He was still exhausted. “I’m not a god remember. You might’ve recovered already, but I haven’t.”</p><p>She climbed off the bed and kneeled in front of him. He looked down at her, an eyebrow raised. “I said I would return the favour. You’ve been kind to me. Unlike others.” </p><p>He opened his mouth to reply but words cut short when he felt her tongue run along his shaft. A grunt of pleasure exited his throat. Placing his hands on her shoulders, he gently pushed her downwards, encouraging her to take him in whole. </p><p>She licked her lips to make them moist, before taking him into her mouth. Moving up and down, she scratched the rims with her teeth. She continued to suck, varying her rhythm then withdrew before he reached his peak, as if she could sense it coming. </p><p>Closing his eyes shut, he tightened his grip on her, feeling the onset of his peak arrive. He grabbed his penis in his hand, rubbing the skin back and forth, until a thick load of semen landed on Hera’s chest. It ran down her belly. He grinned down at her. “Impressive.”</p><p>Hera climbed to her feet. “I think I’m beginning to understand Zeus’s fascination with mortals.” She grabbed her clothing and dressed herself, showing no signs of tiredness.<br/>
On the other hand, Arthur was tired. He stifled a yawn. “Perhaps we’ll meet again on the battlefield.”</p><p>She snorted, turning her nose up at him. “Don’t think this moment between us will change anything. You were merely an experimentation. Something to pass the time.” She walked to the door, stopped, then turned around. “Although, I must say. You did fascinate me. Not as poor as I was expecting. Your queen is fortunate.”</p><p>Guinevere. He hoped she never found out about this. “Yes. Very.”</p><p>“Good day to you.” She opened the door and left.</p><p>He watched her leave then gazed up at the ceiling, a grin spreading across his face. Drinking Baron’s brew had turned out fine after all. A session of lovemaking with the Queen of the Greek pantheon. She hadn’t burned him alive or turned him into a frog. He had survived the encounter unscathed. All he had was a memory he would never forget.</p>
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